We are a couple in our late thirties who married and started a family at a young age over eighteen years ago. We are both normal professionals, educated, raised by religious parents, and have tons of friends in the “vanilla” world who would not guess in a million years what our little secret is. We don’t use the lifestyle as some form of crutch to pacify marital problems, but rather quite the opposite. We are extremely happily married and have been best friends since I first got my driver’s license. We don’t have the view that sex is some special gift that is saved for our spouse only, instead we feel the overwhelmingly erotic atmosphere of the lifestyle increases the quality of our sex, which only adds to the quality of an already fantastic relationship.
We somewhat accidentally found ourselves considering and choosing the lifestyle, rather than seeking it. We had a great group of friends, who we hung out with for years, all of them married. One night during one of our parties, one of the girl’s tops came off, and the next thing I knew most of us were naked. We had a fantastic time and noticed a tremendous increase in sexual intensity for a few days following the event. We said nothing about it to each other, and to be honest, as the husband I was a little worried Mrs. SwingWife would have some issues the next morning. She did not, and over the next few weeks we both seemed to be really working on getting our friends together for some more hot tub fun. We seceded in replicating another night of enjoyable debauchery. As before we noticed the same after effects but still spoke nothing of it. Our hot tub-bing parties became somewhat regular events and were quite innocently enjoyed by all. Until one night, when towards the end of the evening after a bunch of sexual stories being told throughout the night, our friend began to give her husband a blow job right in front of us.
We were absolutely blown away, with both of us smiling ear to ear enjoying our show. My wife eventually wanting to return the favor began to perform the same task on me. Both husbands followed this by giving the ladies their due, with the night ending with all four of us sitting in the hot tub enjoying the afterglow. Needless to say the intensity and duration of our post play phenomenon reached new highs, and once again neither of us really spoke about how much we liked it. Due to events out of our control our hot tub parties with this couple ended and we were devastated, although keep in mind we still had not admitted to each other our tremendous enjoyment of the activity.
Wouldn’t you know within a couple of months we just happened to find some other friends, who happened to have a hot tub, happened to get naked in it, and happened to have sex with each other while we did the same. The next morning after some great sex, we finally started talking about how much we were enjoying our little outings. Through much laughter at our insecurities, and how they had prevented us from talking about it, my wife tells me, “We are swingers, we just need to admit it” We had never swapped with anyone and were clueless about most things swinging, but we knew the release of our sexual inhibitions with others was doing in our bedroom what over ten years of practicing had not.
So the next day we started doing some Google searches on “swinging”, found some forums and started trying to learn more about the lifestyle. That Google search led us to a Swingers Club…..and the rest is history!
We hope this blog helps other couples wrestling with these temptations and fantasies, see that contrary to what your pastor says, there are some great things that can happen. As the lyrics of a song from the movie Aladdin states, “It’s a Whole New World”….